-this quote:
"There are no ordinary moments. There is always something going on."-breakfast with Kasono. Every time I see him I get happy. He's such good people who push me to be a better person myself. He told me all about his life and how he's becoming a citizen next Thursday! We also talked about family and boys, which was really nice and very candid. I feel comfortable talking to him about those things. We planned to meet up again in two weeks because every time we get together its wonderful. I also really want to thank him for giving me complements. Sometimes its good to hear.
-finally being able to do laundry
-a nice walk to the farmers market downtown with Andy. I got a butt load of cherries and grapes and some homemade hummus all for $9. We also had good conversation
-seeing and touching a touch-me-not plant. I wish I had bought one. I think I will next week. I really think I will. I have such fond memories of my own touch-me-not plant back in the old days in my secret garden at the carriage house. It brought me a lot of joy.
-laughter
-late night car rides with padre. We got ice cream and talked about a lot of stuff. He's struggling because a friend of his was killed in a drunk driving accident. I'm glad he was able to talk to me about it. He also said that he didn't have a best friend. Or rather he thought that I was his best friend. I would like him to find a new best friend. I will always be there for him, but at the same time I'm also always going to be his kid. And I would so like to be that first. He talked about how he struggles to reach out and say what he wants and needs and how he's always been the adult and in charge. (Sound familiar?) I got kind of upset at him towards the end of the ride because he mentioned that its in his nature to help people when they're in danger. Now if someone in a wheelchair is tipped over on the side walk, no duh you help them out and if anyone just walks by you, they're a dick. My dad as always been the type of person to help out others like that. I do to. In a heartbeat. However, he also can't seem to stop himself from breaking up a fight. I definitely find that admirable and courageous, but I also find it stupid and selfish. He's not thinking about his safety and how it could affect others if he gets hurt. He said that he couldn't help it. That it's instinctual. But there's always a choice. I'm conflicted about it I guess. Because what he's doing is so selfless and nobel, but at the same time it feels like he doesn't put value on himself and that if other people don't help because of XYZ reasons, they're an asshole. In fight, flight, or freeze, I guess he's a fighter, but he shouldn't get mad that other people are helping by calling the police instead of maybe getting stabbed. A thought just popped into my mind. Maybe I'm really upset...because when I needed help when I was little I didn't get it from him. (Wow. Tears just leapt from my body when I wrote that out.) When I needed him, he wasn't there. That's huge. That is huge.
-the basics
-the ac in my room
-as always, my friends
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