Gratitude on the go! 12-30-13

Today I am grateful for:
-the warmth of my apartment
-Hannah coming over to put together a puzzle. She brought us lunch and also Petey. Amazing.

A work in progress
It's a pretty great puzzle
I wanna see you peacock! 

-a fun show tonight

-being over the hump

-fun improv set. Good listening. Lots of swearing. Oops. :)

-laughter

-my dad coming to see the show 

-happy hour with Emily. Super fun as always even though I still can't really eat anything yet

-the basics

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 12-29-13

Today I am grateful for:

-this quote: 

"Mindfulness is the awareness that arises through paying attention on purpose in the present moment — non-judgmentally."

-being able to eat some solid food.

-getting my new radio in my car! It's pretty amazing. Thanks Santa! 

-being able to say goodbye to Ruth. She's moving out to NY in two days to start her new life. I'm so excited for her! She's gonna do amazing things and I can't wait to see and hear about all her adventures. :) 

-a fun Sunday crowd. 

-the 12 days sketch in the show and still having a blast doing it. 

-watching TERRIBLE lifetime movies and texting Amanda. It's...incredible. 

-laughter 

-the basics

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 12-28-13

Today I'm grateful for:
-waking up this morning to no stomach pain
-being able to go for a walk with Louie this morning
-The warm weather. It's all relative, but 37 degrees honestly feels incredible!
-being able to see Ruth's show!
-two good audiences
-watching Molly McKinney get married in Scotland via the interwebs in real time! The future is now people! The future is now! It was pretty cool.
-being over the hump for holiday shows
-laughter
-being able to eat some solid food. Just some soup, but still. Progress!
-the basics
-popsicles
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-27-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my dad helping me out for most of the day. I got food poisoning. Its the absolute worst. I haven't thrown up in 10 years so that was fun.
-popsicles

This little guy staying by my side the whole day.
He really brought me a lot of comfort
very grateful for that

-the support of the cast
-back rubs
-the basics
-ginger ale
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-26-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my therapist. It was really nice to debreif the past week and all the ups and downs that have taken place. She, as always, was great. Listened and said all the right things.
-getting my car back. It's pretty much fixed up.
-snuggles with Louie
-Hannah and Anna coming to see the show! We hung out afterward too and caught up a lot. Went to Crave and then we went to Williams and played darts. I can't wait for the day when those two move back here!

Here we are at Crave!
We basically got everything on the happy hour menu
Spoiler alert: Something on that table gives me food poisoning

Love these ladies! 

Playing darts at Williams.
I won. Twice.
Woopsies!

-Laughter

-the basics 

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-25-13

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"It's important not to blame yourself for having reactive thoughts  and feelings. They seem to be a natural part of being human."

"Practice hope. As hopefulness becomes a habit, you can achieve a permanently happy spirit."

"Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance."

"Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony."
-Santa coming! :)
-seeing movies with padre. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty and Ancorman Two. They were both really good.
-dinner at Quang. The place was packed. It was really cool to see.
-hanging out with Ruth. We ended up packing up her stuff a bit but it was still a good time
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-24-13

Today I am grateful for:

-breakfast with Anna, Steph, and Joanna. French Meadow. Delish. Also ran into Ruth! Amazing. 

-getting rides from friends while my car gets worked on. 

-the afternoon to myself

-texting

-a pleasant evening with my mom. Another Christmas miracle! She came over to my place, which I really appreciate. We had dinner, opened presents, and hung out with Louie. Louie I think helped a lot. We spent about...2ish hours together. Pretty darn good if you ask me. 

We even took a selfie.
For real.
We haven't taken a picture since 2011. 

-seeing a movie with padre. Saving Mr. Banks. Super good movie. 

-baking cookies with padre and delivering it to firemen that work on Christmas eve. It's a tradition. We've been doing this since I was two or three. As long as I can remember that's for sure. 

-laughter

-the basics

-texting

-my cd's I sent to people arriving on time

-as always, my friends
-

Gratitude on the go! 12-23-13

Today I am grateful for:
-breakfast with Hannah. Went to Gigi's.
-a quiet afternoon
-Jack Barret to step up and play piano tonight for the show. Pete called in sick. Apparently he was admitted to the hospital. He's okay. The show must go on though. And Jack saved the day. He did great.
-A nice audience.
-a two day break!!
-Anna, Steph, Joanna, and Hannah coming over and eating snacks, ordering pizza, playing cards against humanity, and watching the I Love Lucy special in color. It was quite a glorious Christmas eve eve. :)
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-22-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"You live through the darkness from what you learned in the light."
-Hannah coming over and hanging out. She brought Petey too. She treated us to lunch (pho!) and then we watched snl. Louie handled everything really well.

Louie hanging out. 

Petey hanging out.

Louie and Petey hanging out together(ish)! 

-getting a ride to the workshop

-laughter

-a pretty fun improv set. Super patient and fun characters.

-late night drives with Padre 

-the basics

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-21-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"The greatest obstacle to connecting with our joy is resentment."
-sleeping the sleep of sleeps. My body must have really needed it. I slept until almost noon! Granted I had to get up to let the dog out at one point, but otherwise I was out for the count! It felt great.
-Amanda texting to say she arrived safely.
-getting through a two show day and feeling good at the end of the night!
-being present. I'm present that I really enjoyed our improv set tonight and I actually felt engaged and in the scenes. I think a part of it was that I really stuck to my point of view with my characters and that was wonderful. I allowed my characters to take up space and that felt great.
-ice cream
-laughter
-Louie being the best dog and not going to the bathroom inside the house after I had to go do shows for 8+ hours.
-remembering that today is winter solstice. I'm not a fan of this day honestly, but it does mean that the days are gonna start getting longer from here on out. And that is definitely something to be grateful for.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-20-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my dad trading cars for the day. My car needs new breaks bad.
-being able to dog sit for my friend Maggie. Her dog is amazing. His name is Louie and he's an absolute gem.
-getting lunch with Jen!
-the nice lady at the post office
-taking a power nap. Totally unintentional, but my body was spent.
-a long evening of shows coming to an end
-laughter
-being able to see amanda before her trip
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-19-13

Today I am grateful for:

-these quotes:

"Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly."

"The history of the human race is the history of ordinary people who have overcome their fears & accomplished extraordinary things."

-Amanda officially moving in! A ton of people helped move her stuff and we got it done in two trips! The place looks really amazing and pretty much everything in her room and the whole apartment really fits magically together! 

-people coming together to help one another. It honestly is a beautiful thing to witness. 

Candles.

-a really wonderful audience 

-laughter. There were some Choice moments on stage that genuinely made me laugh out loud. Was it inappropriate? Maybe. But everyone enjoyed it. 

-late night chino time with Emily.

-coming home to find Amanda watching friends and crafting. Amazing

-the basics

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-18-13

Today I am grateful for:
-hot showers
-being able to see Rita's little baby Maisy. She's a cutie!
-Amanda's sister giving birth to a healthy baby girl! Molly Noel.
-late night drives with my dad. I've been struggling a bit this week. I've felt lost and confused. I decided to open up to my dad and ask his advice. He was really helpful actually. Way more than I anticipated. It was so hard to actually start talking, but once I did I felt immediate relief. That shit was eating away at me more than I realized. I really appreciated him listening.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 12-17-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Do everything with so much love in your heart that you would never want to do it any other way."
-my therapist. I was struggling a bit to talk today. I just couldn't find the words. She was very patient. As usual. She also was able to reschedule me for the next couple weeks. I'm also grateful that she liked the card I made.
-hanging out with Amanda. She's so strong. I'm honestly in awe.
-being invited to Andy's bday party.
-making new friends
-cards against humanity
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 12-16-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"Sometimes good things fall apart, so better things can fall together."
-soup. I went back to the Soup To Go place and got a flight of soups. Three small soups were exactly what I wanted/needed.
-A fun and easy VO with Augsburg
-podcasts
-public transport.
-kinkos
-love. Today my friend Amanda's dad passed away. It was very sudden and unexpected. She called me and I immediately went over to her place. I don't know what that kind of loss is like. Not many people my age do. When I got to her place though her other close friends were there as well. They were all laughing and drinking beer and shooting the shit. That's love. Being there for someone without question. I felt very grateful as well that I was able to go to call late and leave before improv tonight so I could spend as much time with her as possible.
-laughter. It's like crying only way better.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-15-13

Today I am grateful for:
-a day at home. I didn't have to teach today so I spent most of the day catching up on emails, working on my lergy mix 2013 and catching up on tv. So grateful.
-meeting up with Sarah Agnew to talk about babysitting. She's so nice.
-laughter
-being present. I realized I still super struggle with confrontation. There was a bit of a tense conversation I was witness to tonight and I just couldn't deal with it. I definitely mentally checked out. I didn't know how to handle it. I 100% left my body. It was like I was listening to everything via a walkie talkie. I felt bad. I still feel bad. I didn't know what to do. I did apologize later for not being able to be present during that conversation.
-Hannah and Josh coming over to watch AHS. It's still soooo good!
-The basics
-melatonin
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-14-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly."
-brunch with Kevin

I got my christmas present early.
An itunes gift card!
Just what I wanted!

Also I guess it was my "birthday!"
We got free tres leche cake.
Just what I wanted!

-laughter
-this amazing video:

-peas. haters gonna hate, but I fucking love peas.
-being present. I'm present to the fact that I have to start taking better care of myself. Particularly when it comes to sleeping. I'm working on it. One minute at a time
-the basics
-my warm comfy bed
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-13-13

Today I am grateful for:

-a very quick and easy video shoot at the workshop. 

-all the wonderful things to look at in the downtown skyways today. There was a teen orchestra playing that really captured my attention in particular. Oh and also this:

Seriously this made my day.
I think this discovery will help get me through the bitter winter
I love soup! 

-this quote:

"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences."

-beyoncé's new album. Dropped without any notice. She's always been brilliant in my book and this is just confirmation. She kind of made history in the music world today.

-VO's with Augsburg Fortress. Seriously. I'm so grateful and lucky

-the really nice email I got from Karen Walrond. I signed up for her online class today and after posting a fan girl note, she responded. It made me happy.

-podcasts

-smiles 

-Kat coming to see my show tonight with some family and friends. It was so nice to see them. They seemed to really like the show too. Always a treat to see them. 

-laughter

-people making old 90's movie references. My decade! 

-the basics

-hot showers

-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 12-12-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Attention is the act of connection. and the reward for attention is always healing."
-the weather warming up a bit. It was 18 degrees today y'all! Heat wave up in this piece! Seriously though, in all honesty, it felt warm today. Thaaaatsss...probably not the best sign.
-my calendar working on my phone again.
-the complements I got when I was in my green dress today. I can't help it. It made me feel good.
-a fun show
-laughter
-laughter that makes your sides hurt
-the basics
-late night car rides with padre
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-11-13

Today I am grateful for:
-a fun voice over at General Mills
-the really nice woman at the front desk. Ramona. She really brightened my morning.
-smiles
-a easy corporate video shoot at the workshop
-a afternoon free. I was able to finally sync up my calendar on my phone, which was soo needed it was ridiculous. It took a lot of time, but I'm okay with it. I was feeling so naked without it.
-the new calendar app that is formated the way I like
-a pretty fun crowd for a wednesday night.
-laughter
-goofing around
-catching up with Jaime on gchat. It's been so long. It was nice to hear what was going on with her these days.
-being present. I'm present to how recently I've made plans with friends to watch movies/tv together, but we usually just end up talking. You know, like one would do with friends. I'm a huge fan of this. I love hearing about other people's lives and what's new and exciting for them. My friends happiness is my happiness. Or if things are hard, I'm glad we can talk about them instead of pretending everything is okay. I guess I'm just grateful for connection.
-the basics
-a quiet apartment
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-10-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my therapist. Having two weeks off was hard but I felt we got a lot done. We talked about the anger I've been feeling and how on a biological level that's good. Doesn't make it easy though. Did some more body work, which is always super helpful as well.
-lunch with Christine. Always a treat to see her.
-having the time to do laundry.
-seeing a movie with Ruth. Frozen. It was a bit corny, but in a wonderful way. I enjoyed myself for sure.
-hot showers
-free heat. It's a balmy 72 degrees in my apartment. :)
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-9-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody."
-lunch with Jen. It was nice to catch up just the two of us. And Oscar too of course.

Look at this little guy!
 He's gotten so big!
I suppose I can't really call him little guy if he's gotten big...

-babysitting Ila and Lena. Once again, they bring me a lot of joy to my day. We did some crafting and playing make believe. They're just really good kids that are super kind and fun to be around. My favorite thing of the night that made me laugh really hard was when Lena was singing a counting song and the following exchange took place:

Lena: "Three little dumplings, four little dumplings, five little dumplings...One little dumpling" etc 

Ila: "Lena, what comes after 5?"

Lena: "...Dumpling."

Here are the crafts we made tonight
Some homemade little Christmas Trees
Thank you internet! 

-my actual Christmas tree!

He's cute and adorable and brings me much joy. :)

-the director of Lena's preschool, Kumi, raving about the new holiday show. She said that she's been coming to see them for the last 20 years! That's so awesome! 

-group. Oof. Things got deep today. There were just two of us again, but it was still fine. Talked a lot about my mom. We kind of determined that I was feeling stuck. I guess I am. Stuck about how I want to get closer to my mom but at the same time just be done with our issues. Out of sight, out of mind kind of deal. One of the counselors asked if I would be up for a role play, which I did but it was super hard. My gut reaction was to say no effing way! I could feel myself start to get overwhelmed and I could hear my therapist's voice saying, "what do you feel in your body?" I felt super tight in my stomach, I got really warm, I almost started shaking, my heart rate sped up but at the same time I wasn't really breathing. I did my best to find the areas on my body that weren't feeling stressed and tried to focus on that. It's so hard when its in the moment because my reasoning part of my brain is switched off and I'm so in survival/back brain mode. Like I said though I did it and I think it was helpful. It gave me a lot to think about anyway. And if THAT wasn't enough then we actually started getting into talking about what happened when I was young. Woof. It doesn't get easier. I'm grateful though that group was supportive and let me kind of ride out the waves of what I was feeling and also checked in with me to see if I needed to stop or if I wanted to keep going. That was very helpful. I'm glad I talked first so I was able to decompress a bit while listening. 

-Anna H and W coming over to watch the Sing Off. 

-the basics

-laughter

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 12-8-13

Today I am grateful for:
-having the morning to clean my apartment
-some solid alone time. Super needed.
-a quick sunday show
-laugher
-Hannah and Josh (and peety!) coming over to watch AHS. Seriously that show is so good!
-the basics
-melatonin
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-7-13

Today I am grateful for:
-the time to start cleaning my apartment. It makes me feel very accomplished and also helps me focus.
-two incredible shows tonight. Honestly, I think the 5pm show tonight was the best audience in my time at the workshop. They were so engaged, the laughed at all the appropriate places and then some, and they just seemed to be having the most wonderful time. Since they were having such a good time, we were having a fantastic time too. It was a crazy mad high of awesomeness.
-laughter!!!!!
-goofing around
-feeling happy
-my job at the workshop. Seriously. I love my job and I want to lean into that joy.
-hanging out with Tom and Anna. We didn't watch Downton again. We just hung out and talked. Which honestly makes me really happy. I love just chatting with friends.
-the basics
-my amazingly warm ugg boots. Seriously, thank you again to Rachel who just gave them away to me for $free.99. Outstanding. They're so comfy!
-melatonin
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-6-13

Today I am grateful for:
-laughter
-a long day being over
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-5-13

Today I am grateful for:
-waking up in time to move my car. Snow emergency!
-being done with house sitting. It was really good timing so I'm glad I was able to do it, but I'm also excited to be back in my own bed tonight.
-babysitting Ila and Lena. My goodness they're great girls. I had so much fun with them tonight. We made paper snowflakes and finger paintings and played school and watched Curious George. Lots of fun.
-space heaters
-laughter
-seeing movies with Andy. I was NOT a fan of the movie we saw tonight (oldboy), but I still enjoy our movie adventures.
-the basics
-my roommate officially moving out. I'm sad things ended the way they did. He was such a great roommate for such a long time. Bummer. However, I am grateful for the good times we had.
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-4-13

Today I'm grateful for:
-being able to sleep in
-having a free day. Honestly I was kind of not looking forward to it. I tried really hard to make plans but nothing panned out. So I just kind of sat around and crafted. It was really nice actually.
-my mom coming to see my show. She didn't tell me she was coming, but it wasn't too bad. It also made me acutely aware of how much work I still need to do. I wish my therapy appointment wasn't cancelled this week.
-laughter
-late night texting. Albeit a bit confusing
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-3-13

Today I am grateful for:
-dreaming
-a good wrap up meeting with the history theater. Lots of great new ideas.
-lunch with Megan and Jen! It's been awhile.
-a quiet afternoon.
-getting my new phone! Woo hoo!
-the really kind guy at the tea garden. Gave me just the order I asked for without judgement. I like my iced drink lukewarm. I know. It's weird. I just think it tastes better.
-being able to see Holiday Mix Tape at the BNWSU. It was super funny!
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 12-2-13

Today I am grateful for:

-sleeping pretty well

-having lunch with kdog! Bento boxes. We haven't done that in a long time. Our conversations got a bit deep, but it was good. Still learning a lot about each other. 

-group. Only two of us tonight. I realized the thing most on my mind is stuff with my mom. Again. Ebbs and flows. Minute by minute. 

-Being able to upgrade my phone! Woo hoo! 

-creating 

-the basics

-as always my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 12-1-13

Today I am grateful for:

-being able to sleep in a bit

-improv

-huge theater. Three years ago in the first week of December, huge opened. I was fortunate enough to be one of the first people to perform there in a show called overheard. I'm pretty sure we did a couple of shows for just 2 people. Now they're selling out shows almost every night! It's such an amazing place and community and I'm really grateful to be amongst such incredible talent. 

-butch roy. He gave (and has continued to give) me some incredible opportunities. I keep meaning to thank him in person for all the amazing things that he's done. He's really an inspiration. 

-watching the youth teams perform

-laughter

-smiles 

-the kind guy at the check out counter at Walgreens

-that it's December 1st and there's no snow on the ground yet. 

-being present. This evening has been a bit rough. I think I'm pmsing and not the other option. To be honest I'm feeling a bit lonely. I could have gone out to the big improviser of the year awards, but I wasn't really up to be around a lot of people. I did want to be around a few of my friends though. Idk. Im just having some age old thoughts pop up. "Why would anyone want to be around me? Why am I so stupid? Why aren't I braver?" I know they these thoughts are not true, but that's where I'm at tonight. I'm acknowledging them and trying to be kind to myself. One minute at a time. It will pass. 

-the basics

-melatonin

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 11-30-13

Today I am grateful for:
-getting brunch with Kdog. So much laughter. We also can now finish each others sentences. As well as thoughts. It's nuts.
-my amazing job.
-laughter
-the really nice cop that pulled me over. I totally ran a yellow light. It for sure turned red and I ran right through it. Womp. The officer pulled me over, asked for my license and registration, and just told me to be really careful for the next time. Thank you officer! you really made my night. I totally will not be doing that again.
-watching Downton Abby at Anna and Tom's place. Also catching up and eating food. :)
-the basics
-melatonin
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-29-13

Today I am grateful for:

-this quote:

"My Happiness depends on me, so you're off the hook"

-creating

-a friend canceling plans. Normally I would be upset by this, but I realized I was relieved to have a bit more time to settle in at home before work.

-a two for one deal at chipotle 

-watching funny videos with Andy

-full crowds at our shows tonight

-laughter

-being able to get comp tickets for some friends tonight. Actually they're Jaime's friends but they were in town for Thanksgiving and decided to come see the show!

Maddie and her sister!
They brought me flowers!
Super sweet ladies. I'm glad they could make it.

-some alone time between shows 

-Isaac saying he was going to miss me when he goes to Florida. He's 7 so I have no idea if he actually meant that, or if he was trying to make me jealous. I'm gonna go with the former and call it super adorable! 

-the basics

-hot showers

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 11-28-13

Today I am grateful for:

-getting a iPad game from Andy. It was a really nice treat to wake up to.
-a safe flight home
-podcasts
-getting to thanksgiving dinner on time! We thought we were gonna be late, but we arrived just in time. It was a bit magical
-Thanksgiving. I love giving thanks to everyone around. It's why I have this gratitude journal. To make sure I'm able to really soak in and appreciate all that is wonderful around at all times. As I was sitting in the back corner of the dinner table surrounded by the hodgepodge of people eating a meal that was literally made by everyone, I couldn't help but smile and take in how lucky we all are to have one another. Yes, they were all yelling and drunk and laughing way too loud and saying inappropriate things. Yes, those are the things that usually make me want to curl up or sit in the bathroom by myself for awhile to recover. However, I'm used to those people being wild and out there. I know that going in. And yes, they're not actually my blood relatives in any way shape or form. But I honestly wouldn't have it any other way. They never try to push me out of my comfort zone or ask too many inappropriate questions. That alone is something to be grateful for. I feel lucky to be a part of this giant assortment of people.
-being fortunate enough to have such an incredible homemade meal.
-pie
-seeing a late movie with Emily. Delivery Man. It was soo bad. So bad that it was hilarious
-laughter
-again, getting the opportunity to go to Palm Springs for those few days. I unfortunately had some anxiety, but it was pretty brief. I so enjoyed my time basking in the sun, watching hours of mindless netflix, doing some art journaling, and eating delicious food. It was such a needed get away. I'm very grateful my dad suggested we take that trip. It was just the reboot I needed to continue forward for this holiday season.
-the basics
-as always, my friends. 

Gratitude on the go! 11-27-13

Today I am grateful for: 

-hilarious text exchanges with kdog

-netflix. Seriously. So amazing. 

-the Internet in general. 

-the beautiful clear blue sky 

-art journaling and the comfort that it brings. 

-the quiet grounds where our hotel is located. 

-being able to have the few days off for this trip. 

-getting a massage. It was my first one at an actual spa. It was pretty self indulgent, which I struggled with at first, but once I physically got the massage it was incredible. 

-my "male provider" aka my massage therapist. That's what they called him though before I went in. It made me chuckle. He was super awesome and attentive and continually checked in with me to see how I was doing. 

-being able to just enjoy some tea and sit in the spa. 

-being able to see my cousin Sara and finally meet her husband topher and their daughter miriam. 

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-26-13

Today I am grateful for:

-the warmth of the sun. 

-podcasts

-journaling

-creating 

-a sense of calm

-seeing movies with padre. Saw Prisoners. Finally. I really liked it! 

-cheap movie theaters. Seriously they're so great. They usually have so much character to them. 

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 11-25-13

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"To be independent of public opinion is the first formal condition of achieving anything great."
"There is no point in fighting the storm or willing it to pass sooner. The storm takes the time it takes."
-a safe flight. I slept the whole way. Granted I took a Dramamine before we took off, but still. It made the flight super enjoyable.
-warm weather!
-sunshine
-chatting with Kat for a long time.
-being able to take a crazy long nap. I mean, I think I slept 2 1/2 hours. That's nuts!! I guess my body needed it.
-the bravery of others reaching out. I'm so grateful that they trust me enough to talk to me about what's going on.
-sushi
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-24-13

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"Every small, positive change we make in ourselves repays us in confidence in the future."

"When we are committed to honesty, we help reduce the level of misunderstanding, doubt, and fear throughout society."
-sleeping in
-going to lunch with some people I didn't really know very well. I was nervous, but it wasn't too bad at all. We went to Gandhi Mahal, which was a bonus. It was so good!
-my downstairs neighbor being really chill
-being able to go to a movie with some friends tonight. Saw the Hunger Games. Again. :) Worth it!
-laughter
-the basics
-tea
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-23-13

Today I am grateful for:
-waking up to no alarm
-the Ellen Show. It seriously never ceases to make me happy
-two solid shows
-other people's happiness
-ordinary moments
-a stupid game with Lauren that makes me laugh really hard. Basically you ask a question you already know the answer to, and the other person says the opposite of how they actually feel about it. For example: "Taj, do you like comedy?" "YUCAHK. NO. It's the worst! I mean what's the point!" I like it because 1) It's so silly and 2) You actually find out a lot about how well you know the other person. :)
-laughter
-hanging out with Tom and Anna. We were gonna watch Downton Abby, but we spent too much time talking. It was actually super nice. It's great to just have an old fashion conversation.
-hot showers
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-22-13

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"Whenever you step out of the noise of thinking, that is meditation, and a different state of consciousness arises."
"The journey is the reward."
-dreaming*
-a fun retreat with YF.
-working with Todd and Eric on the YF retreat They were really fun and easy going today. They let me try new things which was really cool.
-free pizza for lunch!
-knowing caffeine is not a thing for me and that every time I have it I feel crazy and out of control. I don't like it. It won't be happening again any time soon.
-the show starting at 7pm tonight and having a short improv set.
-being able to see Catching Fire with Amanda, Katie, and Andy. It was suuper fun. The movie was really good. SO much better than the first one.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

*I had an incredibly vivid dream last night. I was in the airport at night and it was super dark. I was looking for my luggage because I was about to take a plane ride to Brazil for a vacation. When in the plane flying over head I remember just seeing vast amounts of greenery. Everything was so vividly green. Like a brilliant dark foresty green. It was beautiful. When I got to Brazil though I was sad because I didn't bring my ipad and I couldn't really communicate with anyone or watch movies. Although my aunt Pat was in the airport in Brazil and said I could stay with her. Then a jump cut to me being on boat overlooking Brazil. Another jump cut to me riding in front of someone water skiing but no one was pulling us. They were sort of weedy waters with seals all around. I then remember trying to file some paper work so I could teach there and I needed to get it done asap because I had a class in 30 minutes. Although I had no means for transportation. Then I woke up. It was NUTS.

Gratitude on the go! 11-21-13

Today I am grateful for:
-A really great showcase with the kids from the History Theatre. They really pulled it together and were able to showcase their writing. It was great to watch
-a quick fun shoot at the workshop
-Andy and I playing dress up in our corporate clothes to go get coffee. :)
-Generating a lot of great ideas for videos at the workshop in our weekly meeting.
-a good show and fun improv
-Katie being at the workshop to give us notes.
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-20-13

Today I am grateful for:
-South Side really listening and working hard in class today.
-getting a massage by Ellie. It was really, really great. She was super specific to the areas that I requested and gave me extra time and a discount. I was pretty blissed out. I'm definitely recommending her to all my friends.
-trader joes
-being able to go to Literary Death Match. I had no idea what to expect, which was kind of nice. I really enjoyed the slam poetry. There were two slam poets. They both talked about things I could really relate to. It was inspiring. It made me not want to be afraid to share my story. I just need to work on what exactly my story is about.
-going on a third date.
-being present. I'm present to the fact that dating is difficult. It's also great! I still believe that all dating is good dating even when it's not. There are areas in my life that are easier than others. This is not one of the easy ones. So when I struggle in the harder areas I feel like I'm a failure. I know I'm not. I know I'm not. And I've always liked a good challenge. I just wish that sometimes I could get a cheat sheet, too.
-EGBOK
-breathing
-critical awareness. I'm gonna bounce back. Sleep will help.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-19-13

Today I am grateful for:
-sleeping solidly through the night
-my therapist. I was able to talk about some bigger picture issues today without getting overwhelmed. I definitely felt those anxiety/panic moments, but my therapist kept stopping me and making me check in with my body and helped me to relax and calm down. I never felt out of control. She would also make me rephrase things I would say in a negatively about myself and make it positive.
-the realization that self-kindness/self-compassion is actually really helpful even when it feels silly at times.
-driving around the lakes and taking in the view. It's a perfect way to decompress if I can help it.
-CAP. Closing night. Both the shows went really well. I had such a good time. The kids were great, the plays were great, the music was great. It was just all around great. It's so wonderful to see how much joy this project brings to so many people.
-Pillsbury House Theater. They have such a great message and I love how much of a family they are and how well they work with artists.
-chatting about movies. Particularly favorite movies. I shared that my favorite movie is Death Becomes Her. I usually don't share that with just anyone for fear of what they'll say or how they'll react. However, I didn't have that feeling this time. Actually, now that I'm really thinking about it, I did, but I decided to share it anyway. Because I thought if that's the information that tips you over the edge about who I am and what I'm about, then we definitely shouldn't be friends.
-getting some texts that made me really smile. :)
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-18-13

Today I am grateful for:
-youth frontiers. It's such a great organization and I feel very honored to work with them.
-being able to meet up with Jen for a bit. Always a treat. Plus ice cream!
-having a slow afternoon.
-the beautiful harvest moon. I couldn't help but smile
-CAP. We had our first performance tonight. It went really well. Great crowd, fun show, and the kids seemed to really love it. I'm so grateful to be a part of it.
-hugs. In the right mood with the right people, I love hugs.
-late night car rides with padre.
-the basics
-laughter
-spicy food
-hot showers
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-17-13

Today I am grateful for:
-brunch with kdog. It was weird at the start, but we found our stride. I think we were both just tired. We found out a lot about each other. First we started by sharing things we knew about the other person that was not common knowledge. Then we started sharing things that we for sure didn't know about each other before. It was actually when we really started to feel most comfortable with each other.
-Teaching. The kids did well today and I think they're learning more and more each week
-being present. I was late to a tech call for CAP today and I really had to take a second and calm down. I was pissed and worried. I don't think in that order though. It didn't take long to re-center myself after I got there, but in the car ride over I was a bit all over the place. I felt it for sure in my chest. My breathing picked up and I was clenching the wheel very tight. I'm grateful though that I was able to recognize the signs of anxiety. I was thinking about going to a party after tech, but honestly because of how I was feeling I decided for a night in. I think it was a wise choice.
-laughter. Specifically the Ellen Show. Not all the time, but sometimes that show just hits me in the right way and I cannot help but just laugh and laugh. Out loud and by myself! You know something's funny when you're loling by yourself.
-crafting
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-16-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in
-having a crafternoon. I didn't have work until 4pm so I spent the day at home catching up on old episodes of The Ellen Show and did some crafts. It was wonderful. Super calming.
-candles
-having two really solid shows tonight. The five o'clock show was a bit quiet, but not in a bad way. They were just really listening and enjoying what they were watching quietly. The eight o'clock show was stellar. I told the cast this after the show, but I feel that the 8pm show was a really great indication of how people actually like the show. It was wonderful.
-improv
-feeling confident in my improv tonight
-having a lot of energy. I'm not exactly sure what the deal is, but it's all good. A part of me thinks it's the vitamin b I'm taking, but I've been taking it for a month now and it hasn't always been like this. Maybe it takes awhile to kick in?
-being invited over to Anna and Tom's to watch Downton Abby. I forgot how much I loved that show. It was also great to catch up with them a bit one on one. It's sometimes my best form of communication.
-being present. I'm aware that I feel a slight unease right now. Things have been going really well, and I think I'm just tired because it's 3am, but I'm just acknowledging it. I think I'm a bit sad(?) because I wasn't invited out to a thing tonight and because I got less on a VO check than the time before for the same company. I guess I just feel like I messed up in someway. However, I'm leaning into that. I'm aware that feeling like I'm doing less than my best is a trigger to feeling down on myself, so I'm trying out some self compassion. Breathing through it. One minute at a time. I think a good night sleep is going to do wonders.
-laughter
-the basics
-the bright clear starry sky tonight.
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-15-13

Today I am grateful for:

-this quote: 

"Practice being gentle, respectful and loving toward the life force in all living things."

-having a relatively easy class today. 

-opening night at the workshop! It was super fun. The audience was a bit weird, but it was still a blast.
-Amanda creating this:

My dad had to miss the opening of my show tonight.
So Amanda made a cut out of him and put it on a branch.
It was hilarious. 

Here he is again with all my friends!
He's so excited to see the show.

"I'm a vegetarian!"
"Radical Hospitality!"
"Sports!"

-hanging out with Roomie after the show. She is just killin it right now and I couldn't be more excited for her. 

-being able to hang out at a bar with people and not feel awkward or anxious. We closed the place down! What?! Who am I? It was crazy, but also really fun.

-Andy saying some kind words to me. Granted he was really drunk, but I appreciate what he said anyway.
-Drunk complements in general. Being drunk is like truth serum, right? 

-laughter. Man. So much laughter. I fucking love laughter!
-swearing

-being present. I'm present that I'm still in a really good place. On stage tonight singing the 12 days of Christmas I once again had the thought that couldn't believe that this is my job. I grew up watching 12 days. Now I'm a part of it?! That's nuts. And having my friends come out to support me and cheer me on and hang out is just so freakin wonderful. I'm so insanely grateful. I'm softening into that joy hard. I deserve it. Life is too short to not enjoy these simple pleasures.
-the basics
-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 11-14-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in
-Seeing a matinee with Amanda. Enders Game. I enjoyed it. It wasn't as good as the book, duh, but it was still pretty entertaining. We then got tacos afterward. Amazeballs.
-Amanda helping me with my lines. Seriously, so grateful.
-going to the improvathon for a bit and not feeling too awkward or anxious
-a random cat wondering into HUGE. Super cute and cuddly. :)
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-13-13

Today I am grateful for:
-seeing people I care about
-smiles
-being able to be self-compassionate these days.
-laughter
-seeing some improv
-watching American Horror Story with Hannah and Josh. So good!
-being present. I've been feeling pretty content these days. It's a wonderful feeling to have. I still have some stress in my life right now, but in my "white space" I don't really feel anxious or overwhelmed. It's a really lovely feeling.
-the basics
-the stars being magnificently bright tonight. They were so beautiful.
-email
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-12-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Mind is like water, when agitated it becomes difficult to see but if allowed to settle, the answer becomes clear."
-my therapist. We honestly didn't have a ton to talk about today, which was surprisingly a nice change. I told her how each day I've been feeling like myself, especially since October has passed and how happy that makes me. I'm leaning into that. We did some more exercises with boundaries again. I recognized today that the things we've been doing recently I would not have been able to do even a year ago are. It makes me feel lighter to know that I have made progress even if sometimes it doesn't feel like it.
-lunch with Padre
-having a lazy afternoon. I just drove around and listened to music and took in the sites of my beautiful city. The sun was making the lakes dance with light and it was really gorgeous. I couldn't help but smile.
-music
-the basics
-ice cream. I can't help it. I effing love ice cream. I must be back in a good place because it's something that I want again. Because yeah, when I'm feeling Stuck, even ice cream doesn't do it for me. Bad news bears.
-creating
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-11-13

Today I am grateful for:

-this quote:

"Life brings simple pleasures to us every day. It is up to us to make them wonderful memories."
-meeting up with Jen for brunch. Amazing. As always.
-having a quick skype date with Bffl. It was too short, but it was nice to chat even for just a minute.
-AAA. Seriously, AAA is the best.
-laughter
-CAP. So silly
-being beventurous. Andy always gets the most intense drinks. Today I decided to try one as well. I had  a Milo energy drink. Milo! My old childhood pal! It was kind of awesome I'm not gonna lie.
-being able to take a really quick nap. I could have slept longer, but I guess my body only needed a little bit.
-waking up to a pretty great text. :)
-group. After two weeks off, it was so nice to be back. We have one new member, who seems very nice at this point and I'm curious to see how she feels in the group as we continue. It was just so nice to see all the ladies again and hear how everyone is doing. People are making some great progress. It's so wonderful.
-free laundry
-being invited to a movie. Dallas Buyers Club. It was good. It tried to pack a lot into 2 hours but I think it did a good job.
-the basics
-smiles
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-10-13

Today I am grateful:
-sleeping in. Sleeping in hard. I surprised myself.
-brunch with Kdog. We ended up at Amanda's place and got a special table because there was a 45 minute wait. It was great.
-teaching. My students today did really great with the new form we worked on. I'm excited to see how they continue to grow
-being able to grab a tea with Hannah after teaching. I'm also grateful that she was super chill when I got the shakes. She also convinced me to text the guy I went out with a couple of times again. Just to see. If he responds, great! If not, at least I was up front and said what my intentions are. :)
-getting tickets to see Ira Glass with Roomie. It was a super fun show. We were sitting in the back, and they weren't bad seats at all, but right before the show started an usher came up to us and asked if we wanted to sit closer. We were both like, duh! We ended up in the 5th row! It was nuts. The two dancers in the show were phenomenal, and it was great to see their facial expressions since we were so close! Not to mention Ira up close and personal, too. Yeah, it was pretty great, despite the fact that they asked me to come up on stage and slow dance like in middle school with a complete stranger. Yeah...that was...notmyfavorite. However I did it! It was exactly like it was in middle school. Super awkward. They guy I was paired with was waay too into it. He was also like 6'3 and kept squatting down to dance with me to be, "funny". Here's an exchange we had:
Me: "So what's your name?"
Guy: "How old are you?"
Me: "Um...27."
Guy: "I'm 47. Can I touch your back?"
Me: "No."
Guy: "I like to dance with my wife."
Me: "Cool. please stop squatting."
Guy. "Look! Bubbles! My name's Mike."
Thanks for the memories, Mike. Glad you were so excited about that whole thing. Haha they actually turned the whole stage into a middle school dance set up. It was cute.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-9-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to have a slow morning.
-a long dinner break. Andy and I cruised the sky way and I ran into Jeffery! Blast from the past. We then got frozen yogurt and went to target to play with iphones. #nerds. We then had time to go back to the workshop and have another hour to ourselves, which I really appreciated. A nice reboot.
-a good preview crowd. We were able to get some accurate reads on things.
-laughter
-hanging out with people after the show.
-being able to give myself some self compassion
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-8-13

Today I am grateful for:
-getting a solid night of sleep
-a productive rehearsal
-my job. Seriously. I effing love my job and I'm gonna lean into that joy. I mean, we as a cast sat around for about...oh I would say at least 5 minutes listening to fart sound effects trying to determine which would be the best one to use. This. Is. My. Job. BOOM!
-Laughter. Especially from listening to different fart sound effects. Seriously. I could not stop laughing! It was so funny! Again, I love my job!
-my co-workers. They're pretty great.
-getting some sweet texts from Roomie and Bffl.
-being an adult. Sometimes it's just fun and silly. For example, tonight for dinner, I just had two different soups. By choice. BECAUSE I'M A MOTHER FUCKIN ADULT, BITCHES! Two Soup Taj! Woop woop!
-Swearing
-feeling happy. Leaning into that.
-hanging out with some of the guys after the show
-Laughter. Seriously it's the greatest of all time.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-7-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to wake up slowly. I had some stress dreams last night so it was nice to process them and acknowledge that they were just dreams. I actually woke up feeling pretty calm once I realized I was just dreaming.
-how I felt after getting my hair cut. I always feel lighter. Maybe because my hair isn't weighing me down anymore. It feels like a nice breath of fresh air. I got a lot cut off and I'm very pleased with the results.
-laughter
-completing our first preview. It was a bit rocky, but we did it and I'm ready and excited to do it again.
-being able to see Hear No Evil at the Horror Fest. It was super great. It really tapped at all of your senses, which I loved.
-the basics
-hot showers
-again, still feeling like myself.
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-6-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves."
-snacks during tech
-laughter
-the weather still being warm enough to melt last night's snow fall. I'm still not quite ready for that.
-getting a bit of down time and alone time for my dinner break in an otherwise packed day.
-late night car rides with Padre. We talked about our favorite pizza places to go in the cities. It was so silly. We basically talked about that the whole time.
-the basics
-still feeling like myself.
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-5-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my therapist. We did some great boundary stuff again. Micromovement as she calls it. I'm learning. Slow and steady.
-a very productive tech day. It was hard work, but really enjoyable. And even though it was a really long day, we all were in relatively good spirits and got along great.
-laughter
-feeling more like myself today. Minute by minute
-my e-course. It's proving to be very rewarding. Extremely challenging, but also rewarding.
-compassion
-watching a scary movie with Jaime
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-4-13

Today I am grateful for:
-hanging out with Oscar. He's pretty darn cute.
-a productive tech rehearsal
-feeling more like myself today in awhile
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-3-13

Today I am grateful for:
-an extra hour of sleep.
-brunch with Kdog. Hilarity ensued per usual.
-the weather being super beautiful and warmish
-hanging out with Amanda and Brittany. We got tacos (duh) and then we went back to Amanda's where they helped me with my lines. Super grateful for that! We also had some super lively discussions about snl casting, politics, and women's rights. It was pretty great. Then Ruth joined us and we watched  some funny videos as rewards for learning our lines. We win! Successful night.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-2-13

Today I am grateful for:
-having brunch with Roomie. Always such a treat to see her.
-closing night. It was a really great run but it was also wonderful to put this one to bed. It was just the right amount of time. I'm excited to be working on something new!
-hanging out with the guys after the show. I sometimes really enjoy just going out and listening.
-laughter
-getting some lovely texts
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 11-1-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"We can never obtain peace in the world if we neglect the inner world and don't make peace with ourselves."
-being able to stay in bed until the afternoon. I needed it.
-the amazing weather today. I mean truly gorgeous.
-The sun. Such a beautiful and amazing star the sun is.
-Vitamin D. Specifically from the sun but also in pill form
-getting a surprise check. Couldn't have had better timing.
-the support of my landlord.
-compassion.
-music
-light
-smiles
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-31-13

Today I am grateful for:
-having lunch with Jen! I brought some Pho over to her place and we were able to catch up.
-Homemade chocolate chip cookies. Seriously. They were amazing.
-the beautiful fall leaves on the trees. They're very vibrant right now
-a fun crowd for the show.
-halloween. I didn't really do anything, but I sure do love this holiday. It might be my favorite?
-kind words of support
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-30-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Never apologize for showing feelings. When you do so, you apologize for truth."
-Getting a running order of the first act of the show. Super helpful.
-CAP
-An evening spent with Ruth, Amanda, and Brittany. I love these ladies. We went to Brasa and Ruth regaled us with stories about her life right now. She's so happy. So I'm happy.

I am so grateful for these woman. So, so grateful. 

-Brittany giving me some really solid advice.
-laughter

-watching silly videos online 

-the basics

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-29-13

Today I am grateful for:
-sleeping really soundly.
-my therapist. She unintentionally triggered me right at the top of our session, which was definitely challenging. A lot of shame rose up extremely fast. I had a small anxiety attack as a result. It just brought to my attention that I still struggle to value my own opinions and thoughts. I'd rather make everyone else around me comfortable and sacrifice my own happiness to make it happen. My therapist calls it self protective. I call it stupid fucking bullshit. I hate that it's still the case, but it is. I used to view taking care of others no matter the cost an asset, but I know now that I also have to take care of my own needs, too. It just feels so self indulgent. I'm trying to be kind to myself about it, but shame really got the best of me. And on top of that I felt embarrassed. I think what also made today's session particularly hard was that I was going to talk about that exact subject. That I still struggle to say or do what I want in fear that it might make others upset. Even as I'm writing this I'm getting a bit agitated. However, as much as it sucked, I am grateful it happened. It led us to work on a pretty powerful exercise with boundaries. One minute at a time.
-a short rehearsal
-a few really nice texts
-taco tuesday with Ruth. We also got Tres Leches Cake at Amanda's place. SO GOOD.
-seeing a fox on my drive home. I was having a pretty intense relapse of previous feelings so it was nice to have a distraction that pulled me out of it. Thanks fox. I wonder what you would say to that. :)
-this video. I've never watched this show, but this made me all kinds of happy:

-also this:

-laughter
-the basics
-Jaime asking if I wanted to watch a scary movie. Yes please.
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-28-13

Today I am grateful for:
-a fun VO this morning.
-a productive rehearsal.
-CAP. Arley is the greatest. Our show is super fun. Like, SUPER fun. I'm excited for it!
-getting a massage tonight. It was my birthday treat to myself. 90 minutes of greatness. I kind of half dreamt while I was on the table. I was definitely present for the majority of it, but once he started massaging my feet I kind of checked out. Sorry I'm not sorry!
-laughter
-feeling relaxed
-egg drop soup. Still my favorite. Now until forever.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-27-13

Today I am grateful for:
-sleeping in until 11am. I must have really needed it.
-a productive get relaxing morning
-teaching. Those kids do some really wonderful scene work. It's sometimes so fun to watch.
-finding out I had a free evening.
-Hannah, Josh, and Petey coming over to watch American Horror Story.

Petey was so excited he did the splits! 

-Ruth is back in town! I picked her up from the airport and we caught up a bit while I drove her to her car. She's doing so well. I'm so excited for her!

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-26-13

Today I am grateful for:
-a good nights sleep.
-this quote:
"If you dont take a chance, you dont stand a chance."
-brunch with Kdog. It's just always a good time.
-laughter
-having a few hours by myself to recharge.
-padre coming over to help me put something up that I couldn't reach by myself. It's very rare he's the tall one. I understand that feeling. You're welcome, padre!
-two good crowds for the shows tonight.
-being brave and going to a costume party. I dressed as a giant. You're welcome, party people.
-friendly faces that are welcoming.
-being asked to join a ladies fun get together group. Honestly, not much else could make me happier than that today.
-the basics
-being snuggled in bed
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-25-13

Today I am grateful for:
-waking up before my alarm and feeling rested
-a productive rehearsal.
-a great audience
-a fun improv set
-a really phenomenal complement from an audience member. They were a total stranger to me. In my opinion, those are the best kind of complements because they have no obligation to tell you how they feel. Basically they said that I was their favorite and while the rest of the cast was at a 9.5 out of 10 in terms of awesome, I was at a 20. It put a huge smile on my face. I'm so very grateful.
-the moon tonight! It was big and low in the sky and was a dark orange. There were wispy clouds in front of it. It was Super beautiful.
-late night drives with Padre.
OMG THIS! Apparently this link is old news, but it's new to me and I freaking LOVE IT. I could NOT stop laughing.
-feeling more like myself. Minute by minute.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-24-13

Today I am grateful for:
-These quotes:
"Happiness mainly comes from our own attitude, rather than from external factors."

"Prepare for the new; expect the new; embrace the new. Otherwise, you'll just repeat what's old."
-A voice over with Target
-having a few hours in between gigs.
-email volleys
-feeling seen. Quick story: I was at Walgreens tonight, you know buying shampoo, deodorant, paper towels, etc, and I was heading to the check out line and I hear this guy say, "That is a great purse. Is that the skyline of MPLS on there?" I actually wasn't really paying attention because I didn't realize he was talking to me. The only reason I looked up at all was because I wanted to see this person's potentially awesome purse. It took me a second to register that, yes indeed, he was talking to me. I explained the purse was not a skyline of mpls, just a random design. He then asked if he thought it was weird that a guy complemented a purse. I said no and actually I found it flattering. He said that made him feel good. He then asked me my name and vice versa and said it was really nice to meet me and I said the same back to him. The whole conversation felt very flirty? Is that a thing? Flirting with guys at the checkout counter at Walgreens? Maybe. I guess I felt seen tonight. Like this guy was doing more than just looking at me. He was seeing me. I don't know. Maybe that's just wishful thinking. Gotta start somewhere right? He was tall, dark, and hansom. Even after he left and I was still checking out, when I got outside to go to my car he waved to me from his car and said goodbye again. His name was Calvin by the way. Or Kalvin. I didn't ask if it was spelled with a C or a K. I'm gonna assume with a C, but I secretly hope it's with a K. 
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-23-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in a bit
-getting out of rehearsal early.
-catching up on some horror movies
-going on a second date. It was very nice. Super low key. We went to the Kity Cat Klub. He makes me smile. We chatted about going on a third date. So, we'll see. Minute by minute.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-22-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my therapist. I was glad to be back and debrief things with her. I always appreciate her support and visualizations.
-rehearsal
-going to an incredible concert. Janelle Monae. It might have actually been the best concert I've ever been to. I met with Roomie around 5:15 to get happy hour before the show. The doors opened at 6 but apparently Janelle wasn't going to go on until 9. I was worried it was just gonna be a lot of waiting around. It wasn't too bad at all actually. After waiting in line for almost an hour or so, we finally got into the space and even though there were a TON a people ahead of us, we magically right up in front! I was really excited about that. There was an opening act that was pretty bleh, but it didn't matter. Her show was a spectacle from top to bottom. The mood, the costumes, the lights, the sound, her singing! It was just fanfreakintastic! She played for about 2 hours and hit on all her big songs. She also did two fantastic covers of a Jackson 5 song and a Prince song. It was so cool! And she crowd surfed! I totally helped. :) Basically, it was outstanding. I'm so grateful Roomie asked me to go with her. It was 1000% worth it.

Just getting a front row spot of Janelle doing her thang.
So much winning. 

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 10-21-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"She could never go back and make some of the details pretty. All she could do was move forward and make the whole beautiful."
-a quick VO pickup for Dairy Queen
-Target. Even though I can never get only one thing.
-a productive rehearsal
-CAP. And it begins. Andy and I are doing a play together. Arley wrote A SEQUAL to his show from last year. I'm very excited to reprise my role as baby leopard.
-going over to Anna's and watching Hocus Pocus. Her house is really, really great. Oh, and so is HP. Always will be amazing.
-Starting my 6 week Brene Brown art journaling/life class. I'm very excited about it. It's already posed to be challenging, but in a great way. I'm already having to remind myself to let go and lean in. Can't wait to find out what the rest of the class will have in store.

One of our assignments was to write
"I am imperfect and I am enough" on our hand
and take a picture of ourselves. 

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends. 

Gratitude on the go! 10-20-13

Today I am grateful for:
-the morning off. I relaxed. Caught up on some emails. Watched some tv.
-the youth team. They were pretty great today. There weren't a lot of them because of MEA, so we all taught as a big group. I like that because I can learn new exercises myself
-my e-course starting up!
-Jen Scott. It's her birthday today. She is such a light in my life. I hope when I grow up I can be half of her awesomeness. She's so kind and giving and warm and fun and inspiring. I hope she had an amazing day.
-an evening with Hannah and Brittany. We got tacos, which were amazing, and then we get dessert from Muddy Waters and came back to my place and played some more cards against humanity, watched AHS, and carved some pumpkins. Josh and Peety also came over. Super fun and low key night.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-19-13

Today I am grateful for:
-the big things
-the little things
-the in between things
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-18-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in
-waking up to a great text.
-laughter
-remembering this quote:
"Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your heart."
-being present. I'm not going to lie, I had a really bad set tonight and it's eating at me. It got to my core. When I don't feel funny, I don't feel like me. I'm trying to be kind to myself and shake it off, but I can't. Not yet. I know sleeping on it will make it better. So that's what I should do.
-seeing the new Carrie movie tonight. It was actually pretty darn good. I'm a bit behind on my scary movie watching but I should be able to do some catching up this weekend. I have to remember to count AHS and Walking Dead.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-17-13

Today I am grateful for:
-getting another VO for the Y. Super fun!
-having time to run errands.
-getting a text about meeting up next week. :)
-the opportunity to do some sound stuff!
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-16-13

Today I am grateful for:
-breaking ice. We had an early morning show (8am) but it went really well. The audience seemed to really like it a lot, which is obviously what one hopes for. They had some great feedback to what they took away from the performance. Boom.
-being able to meet up with Duncan! We got brunch (it was 10:30 and the place we went to only had soup. It was weird, but I love soup so it didn't bother me) and then we went and drove to the falls and around some lakes. It was really wonderful to see him!

Badunkadunk!
We both wore purple!
Hooray! 

-laughter

-dinner and a show with padre. We got some great sushi and then went to Cirque Du Soleil. Really fun. There was on bit in particular that blew my mind. I'm not going to be able to explain it well, but basically this woman was playing pick up sticks with GIANT sticks that by the end were all balancing on themselves. It was nuts and incredible. Definitely my favorite thing of the night.

No pictures allowed inside.

-the basics

-feeling a bit more like myself for longer periods of time. 

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-15-13

Today I am grateful for:
-feeling like myself again for most of the day. One minute at a time
-rehearsal. Good feedback on stuff.
-laughter. So much laughter at rehearsal today. It was wonderful.
-being able to speak my thoughts out loud. Someone was talking to me about my mom and I honestly couldn't really deal with it. I knew it was getting me upset so I just said I can't talk about this right now And they just said, "okay that's totally cool. We never have to talk about anything you don't want to." and then we moved on. It was just that easy. I was a little bit shocked. I do eventually want to finish that conversation, but I just couldn't do it tonight. And that's okay.
-daring greatly. I went on a date tonight. And you know what, it was fun. I had a really good time. Our conversations were very natural and relaxed. I never felt like either one of us were struggling to find things to talk about. Yeah there were a few awkward pauses, but nothing out of the ordinary. We actually had more in common then we thought. So yeah. I don't know what's going to happen next, and you know what? That's okay. One minute at a time. Tonight was fun and that's what matters. He was very sweet. And he paid. Bonus points for sure. :)
-the basics
-being able to be in bed by 10pm. #adulting
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-14-13

Today I am grateful for:
-waking up naturally
-encouragement from unlikely sources
-group. Just two of us again. It was really good though. I was able to process some of my feelings about all the bullshit drama going on. I got good feedback.
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 10-13-13

Today I am grateful for:

-hanging out with Lydia. going out to brunch and watching scary movies. It was very nice

-the weather being warmish

-dinner at Brasa with Amanda, Brittany, and Hannah. We basically got everything on the menu. Then we went back to my place and played cards against humanity and watched American Horror Story. It was so great. I was able to take my mind off of things for a bit. 

I love these ladies.
They're all kinds of amazing.
I'm so very lucky.

-laughter

-the basics

-as always, my friends. 

Gratitude on the go! 10-12-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in. Although now that I'm officially an adult, sleeping in is like 9:30.
-this article: 29 underrated things about being in your late 20s
-this article: 13 things you probably didnt know about hocus pocus
-hanging out with Kdog. We went to our popover place and laughed and laughed and laughed. He honest to goodness makes me laugh so genuinely hard it's incredible.
-rediscovering bestie by bestie.
-feeling like myself again for a bit. Minute by minute.
-laughter
-the beautiful moon. It was even more breathtaking last night.
-good crowds for the shows tonight
-the basics
-melatonin
-as always, my friends