Today I am grateful for:
-sleeping in.
-having my first day off since August. It feels fantastic.
-getting up the courage to call the abuse support group. They said I had to take the short term course before I started in the long term one. Fair enough. I did an intake with them and they're going to get back to me when they have enough people to start. I'm scared about it, but I'm glad I called.
-purging. I was able to get rid of a lot of stuff. There are so many things I've been holding on to for no reason. There are still a few things that I have found that I'll be keeping. Like a card from my grandma, or an old fanny pack from the 90s, or my Speak and Spell. Those have some pretty clear memories attached to them.
-being able to watch mindless tv. For a few hours. :)
-finding out that my mom also has a gratitude journal. I'm sure we're journaling about different things, but that is something that we have in common.
-having dinner with my dad.
-getting my apartment situated with my new furniture. Nesting is...how do I put it...um...all kinds of amazing.
-Laughter
-Breathing
-enjoying the moment. My roommate and I are separately on our own computers but sitting right next to each other. It sounds antisocial, but it's totally not. It's comfortable. We're respecting each others space.
-listening to great music. I haven't made a mix cd in a long time (probably because it's becoming a "retro" thing to do now) and I forgot how amazing it is!
-being present. Today I am present to the fact that when I don't hear back from people, friends in particular, I start to concoct scenarios in my mind about why they're not getting back to me. "Are they mad at me? Did I do something wrong? Was I being a burden? Should I stop contacting them?" Those thoughts spiral very quickly into, "Ugh! This is not about you. Why are you so selfish? I'm a bad friend." Then those thoughts leads to, "This is how I treat my mom sometimes when I don't contact her. I should contact my mom. I'm a bad daughter. I'm so that ungrateful!" Etc, etc, etc. I have to remind myself to breathe. I am present to those thoughts. I know I'm not a bad friend. I know I'm not a bad daughter. I'm breathing. I'm letting them go. They're just thoughts. They're just chipmunks. They don't control me.
-the basics
-my glasses. I feel really good when I wear them.
-this quote:
"We are responsible for our own destiny. What matters is how we improve ourselves from this moment forward."
-As always, my friends
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