Gratitude on the go! 4-27-14

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"Art is the only way to run away without leaving home."

"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
-people with the gift of writing. I think I've talked about this before, but really it's worth mentioning again. Even trying to come up with the words to describe how wonderful it is to read someone's thoughts is hard for me. Whether it's funny, thought provoking, or just eloquent I am so grateful for it. I've never been good at metaphors or imagery or poetry or spelling for that matter. My writing is pretty much how I'm feeling straight up or recapping events that have taken place and how I felt straight up about those events that took place. I'm trying some new things with the prompt a day* stuff, but it's still not easy. That's why when I read the bloggess or chookooloonks or just my friends emails sometimes I get so inspired by their words and how it can provoke so many feelings in me. I'm grateful for that.
-quite. Padre and I took about an hour and a half drive tonight. In silence for the most part. It was nice to just have some white space and listen to the radio.
-my mom dropping off a goodie package of food for me. Homemade pizza, chutney chicken wings, and some hummus and pita bread. I shall eat like a champ for a good week.
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

*Sundays Are For...

Sundays are for...
sleeping in
for teaching kids
for wrapping up
and beginning again
Sundays are for...
tv time
potential ladies night
winding down
and, for some, drinking one more glass of wine
Sundays are for...
having space
taking a breath
dinner at home
and putting a hydrating mask on my face
Sundays are for...
getting in bed
checking all the internets
stalling to sleep
and gearing up for the week ahead

Gratitude on the go! 4-23-14

Today I am grateful for:
-These butt load of quotes:

"Invisible tears are the hardest to wipe away."

"When we bring what is within out into the world, miracles happen."

"Everything that happens is designed to awaken us. Everything."

"Be grateful for whoever comes, because each guest has been sent as a guide from beyond. 

"Don't leave before the miracle shows up."
-the prompt for the day*
-laughter
-the basics
-as always, my friends

*All That Glitters

looking up while it's raining
freshly fallen snow
the lakes on a sunny day
Iconic uptown buildings
twirling dresses
smiling faces

Gratitude on the go! 4-22-14

Today I am grateful for:
-the awesome trio and their unwavering support always.
-these quotes:

"Every single person has at least one secret that would break your heart. "

"Heroes and cowards feel exactly the same fear - they just respond differently."

"Forgiving those who hurt us is the key to personal peace."

-being able to try something new today.
-lunch outside with Hannah
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-21-14

Today I am grateful for:
-A super adorable day with Maisie. So many smiles. So much winning.

Some seriously funny tummy time.
Just look at this goober!
Gah I cannot even stand it!

-my new every day 1 class. Lots of different types of people right off the bat and I'm excited to get to know them more in the next 8 weeks. Also, there was one girl in the class that knew me from Without A Box! So crazy! My brain definitely did a weird shift.

-the daily prompt*

-these quotes!
"Hope is the feeling that the feeling you have isn't permanent."

"A fall into a ditch makes you wiser."
"Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow."

-the basics
-as always, my friends

*Throes of Spring

Spring!
A time of renewal
A time of rebirth
A time of revival
Spring!
A time of growth
A time of greenery
A time of geese?
Spring!
A time of storms
A time too short
A time of SNOW?!

Gratitude on the go! 4-20-14

I haven't been writing. I've been writing a little bit. In my actual journal. I've been trying to jot down some highlights that have happened over the last few weeks.

-I had one of the best bank experiences recently. Everyone at Wells Fargo made my feel like a million bucks and I was the only person that mattered there even though they were really busy. I was greeted with a smile and then handed a free bottle of water and by the end of my time there I was walked out of the store. It was really wonderful.
-The outstanding weather! Today it was 75 degrees. I was sweating. And I was okay with it. :)
-Also today, I ran a 5k. Not an official one, but I ran around lake Harriet, which is almost exactly 3 miles around, and I did it in 30 minutes. I didn't stop once. I'm not gonna lie, I was really proud of myself. I couldn't believe I did it. I felt like stopping a few times but I pushed through it. It was a really big accomplishment for me. And in 30 minutes?! For me, who could never even run the mile in school without stopping once or twice, this is huge. I'm grateful I stuck it out even when it got hard. Hard is okay. Hard is good.
-Speaking of hard, this last few weeks have been all the feelings. I'm not feeling "stuck," which I guess is a plus. I have had some serious anxiety though. Anxiety and shame. It's been awhile since it's been this bad. In truth, I've been dealing with heart ache. As much as I've tried to deny it to myself, I really fell for this guy. I'll call him Music Man. MM said and did a lot of things that made me really believe he felt a certain way about me. For a long time. I would say for the better half of a year really. Maybe more at this point. 8 months? Anyway, it seems that MM just wanted his cake and eat it too. Which he did. There was a part of me that knew it wouldn't end well, but my feeling goggles were on tight and I didn't care. I also had no idea that it would turn bad so quickly. I don't know. I'm still trying to figuring it out. I've been feeling a lot of confusion. Thankfully, I've had some great support from my friends throughout this tumultuous time. Earlier today for example, Kdog asked me how things were going with MM. I decided to reach out and actually share how I was feeling. And he just sat there and listened to me thoughtfully and without judgement. He took up space with me. I'm so grateful for that. I'm also grateful for texts of encouragements and love. I'm grateful that I love my job and that when I'm working I can totally forget about how I'm feeling. It's really incredible actually. I'm grateful that it's not always painful. One minute at a time. One. Minute. At. A. Time.
I'm grateful for today's prompt of the day.*

*Something Changed.

Something Changed.
It happened so suddenly.
"This is better than I could have ever imagined."
Blink.
Silence.
Hard silence.
Something Changed.
It was so easy before.
"I want to spend all my time with you"
Blink.
Silence.
Radio silence.
Something Changed.
Yet so much is the same.
"Wanna go see a movie?"
Blink.
Silence.
Deafening silence.
Something Changed.
Everything changed.
Almost everything.
My feelings haven't changed.
Blink.
Blink.
Blink.
Something please change.

Gratitude on the go! 4-6-14

I haven't been writing down my gratitudes every day. At least not here. I've kind of just been trying say when I'm grateful in the moment that it's happening instead of taking time aside and write it down which sometimes takes me out of the moment.

I've had so much to be grateful for these past couple weeks but here are couple of highlights:

-On friday it was one of the best shows I've been a part of at the workshop. It's so incredible how powerful an amazing crowd can be. We were riding the wave of awesomeness all night. It was pretty spectacular.
-My students gave a really incredible performance at their showcase. Knocked it out of the park in terms of listening, sharing space, and having a good time. It was wonderful to watch.
-Brittany is back in town and its been SO great to catch up with her and exchange stories about life, work, and to be honest mostly boys.
-Laughing every single day.
-being asked back to work at the Science Museum for a couple months.
-having some intimate times with a guy I care about
-the basics
-as always, my truly amazing friends.
-oh and these quotes:
"We never learn important things by being told. We have to find out for ourselves."

"As long as you have certain desires about how it ought to be you can't see how it is."

"Even in your darkest moment, you usually can find something to laugh about if you try hard enough." 

"If you fail, learn, and move on, you're growing."

"Whenever you fall, pick something up."

"The single most important key to connecting to and expanding your feelings of being worthy and deserving, is accessing peace."

"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, but because we do not dare, things are difficult."