Gratitude on the go! 4-30-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my therapist. She really has her shit together. Thank goodness. I did not have my shit together today. I bet she would say differently, but what I felt like was a big old pile of mush. I felt helpless. Helpless like I haven't felt in a long time. I'm trying to be kind to myself today because even though I felt (and still feel) like a failure, I know I'm not. I did a lot of self care today. I reached out*, I treated myself, and I found ways to laugh.
-inappropriate jokes. Turns out they really help me relax in times of intense stress. I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing. I think it's just a thing.
-laughter. I'm beyond grateful for laughter and all the benefits that it does for people.
-tulips blooming.
-trees blooming
-spring
-the beautiful weather.
-CAP
-drives with padre
-the basics
-breathing
-remembering it's going to be okay
-as always, my friends

*I really want to write a list of addendums to my self care list. I'm fighting extremely hard against it.

Gratitude on the go! 4-29-13

Today I am grateful for:
-nannying again. #win
-being outside at a playground all day. For work. #doublewin
-meeting up with Maggie before group at the tea garden. Walked in and she was reading Daring Greatly. #seriouslysomuchwinning
-group. I'm loving it more and more. And it's only week two. Today we created goals for ourselves. It felt very productive.
-late night car drives with padre
-the seriously beautiful weather.
-showers
-ice cream
-remembering to breath
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-28-13

Today I am grateful for:
-The beautiful weather
-things starting to bloom
-seeing Ellie
-crafting
-my kids doing some really fun scenes during their montage.
-laughter
-playing on the playground with my kids for part of class. So much fun to just goof around.
-being silly
-remembering to breath.
-movie nights with jaime
-discovering that they made A Wrinkle In Time into a made for tv movie. AND THAT IT'S ON NETFLIX. Seriously, this just made my week.
-melatonin
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-27-13

Today I am grateful for:
-Getting a full night of sleep.
-the SMM
-being silly
-no more two show Saturdays until the fall.
-two great volunteers
-Megan reaching out via email to talk out her struggle. I feel extremely honored that she trusted me enough to share.
-remembering to let things go.
-the basics
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-26-13

Today I am grateful for:
-amy helping me through a shame storm. I was a legit hot mess for about 20 minutes. She let me talk text it out and I felt a world better. I'm so grateful shes my move a body friend.
-the fact that I was actually able to reach out when I was in struggle. A year ago I would not have been able to do that.
-these two adorable girls that came up to me after my last smm show. Their names were Piper and Ginger. They made me smile.
-the bartender at the workshop sharing a story about a time he messed up at work. It was so kind of him to do that. It wasn't like, "oh you think You got it bad? Listen to This story!" It wasn't like that at all. It was more of a, "me too." story. We all make mistakes. We move on. I'm really grateful for his openness to share that with me.
-swings.
-a great audience volunteer. Another true story!
-a wackadoo set. We went weird. We went blue. But the audience was with us the whole time.
-swearing.
-this day being fucking done.
-melatonin
-the basics
-remembering to breathe.
-laughter
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-25-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Try again. Fail again. Fail better."
-A wonderful lunch with Brittany.
-Shanan being back to teach with me.
-the incredible writing that the kids shared in class.
-being able to take a nap in my car.
-a really nice audience.
-the sweetest volunteer who told a true story on stage!!
-fun improv
-tiny tacos
-reading other peoples blogs. Sometimes its like a glimpse into their inner world of thoughts. How people are really doing and feeling.
-other people's courage.
-remembering that thoughts are just thoughts.
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-24-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams, who looks inside awakes."
-a leisurely morning
-cooking a homemade breakfast. Scrambled egg whites with garlic, onions, and spinach.
-teaching opportunities. I got to work with the 8th graders again from Seats to Stage. They were really awesome today. Their writing is really good and sometimes truly powerful. Then tonight I subbed my first adult class of the evening. It was an Every day 2 class. They were so great. Full of energy and willing to try everything I threw at them. So much fun.
-an epic gchat with Jaime. We were gonna watch a movie but we just kept chatting. It was long overdue. We had so much to catch up on. She really is one of my best friends. I'm glad we were able to connect and touch base about how we're doing with everything. She's also legit one of the funniest people I know. I'm so grateful she's in my life.
-books
-making plans
-melatonin
-the basics
-having the apartment to myself today. It was really glorious.
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-23-13

Today I am grateful for:
-Anna Pop sending me a link for some awesome simple smoothie recipes
-how wonderful everything looked today. Yes there was another snow storm yesterday, but today the sun was shining brightly, the snow stuck to the trees looked so beautiful, and it was warm enough to melt most of the snow by mid afternoon. I was driving around this morning and I just keep looking around and smiling. It was a bit breath taking to be honest.
-my therapist. We broke some new ground today I think. I got mad today. Like, legit mad. It was overwhelming, but not unbearable. She also asked if I was familiar with Brene Brown's work. I almost starting laughing out loud. Do I know Brene Brown's work. Silly Marit. :)
-my car. I find a lot of peace and solitude in my car. Today I just needed to recline for a bit and take a nap. My body was a bit overworked with anger. I just needed to lie down and relax it out. I'm grateful my car was there to help me out.
-laughter
-making dinner at home
-getting a stubs card for AMC
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-22-13

Today I am grateful for:
-smoothies
-leftovers
-podcasts. This American Life in particular
-Sara Bareilles new single. It's SO. GOOD.
-VO opportunities
-my first time teaching solo going relatively well.
-group. It was just the first day but I think things are going to be good. Some people I know from my last group are in it and I'm really excited about that.
-laughter
-other peoples bravery
-the apartment to myself
-peas
-melatonin
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-21-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"One can not reflect in streaming water. Only those who know internal peace can give it to others."
-Brunch with Ruthie at Amanda's new restaurant.
-a relative easy day of teaching.
-Seeing an amazing show called The Great Divide with Amanda and Ruthie. It was a wonderful political piece that did an incredible job toeing the line of the right wing/left wing point of view. I definitely found myself agreeing with both sides throughout the show. And Dawn and Paul were outstanding. Simply outstanding. I was honestly moved more than once to both laughter and to tears. Excellent show.
-laughter
-these pictures:

Art work on the wall at the Playwrights Center.
Money put into capsules

Ruthie and I creating our own masterful artwork.
#livingthedream! 

Amanda trying to light her cigarette.
"DON'T LOOK AT ME!"

-The basics

-remembering to breathe 

-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-20-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Prepare no one's heart but your own and be kind."
-the sun feeling warm today. I actually had to take off my coat when I went outside.
-the sound of snow dripping as it melts.
-TJ's
-really fun audiences for both shows tonight.
-sweet volunteers. They played along really nicely.
-being able to think up some good rhymes. Finally!
-the super fun improv set tonight. Particularly the duet that Andy and I performed. Our suggestion was, "Boobies." I knew right away I needed to take some charge otherwise I was going to be too uncomfortable. So I decided to be bold and make the declaration that I was going through puberty and I had to talk to my dad about what was happening. Andy supported it fully and we had a great scene. He bought my character a bra and tried to explain that other things were going to be happening to my body too. The scene ended with the full moon coming out which implied I was about to transform into a woman who got her period. It was really fun. I got to belt the final notes at the end of the scene too. :) I felt really connected to my scene partners tonight, which was wonderful. Connection obviously improves scenes dramatically. I also felt connected with my physical choices too. I've been trying to do some power stances. It sounds silly, but I think it's actually helping. I guess overall I felt confident and happy.
-laughter
-This stellar advice:

-Having the apartment to myself 

-being present. I'm present that I'm more aware of my body and how it's reacting to things and situations. The awareness is a positive thing too. I don't feel like I'm scrutinizing over every little thing that I do. I'm going to take that as a good thing. It feels good anyway. 

-melatonin 

-the basics

-as always, my friends. 

Gratitude on the go! 4-19-13

Today I am grateful for:
-the snow not getting me down!

It's a Christmas miracle! Oh wait...
(Also Nora's comment made me laugh out loud. So perfect.)

-Seeing Jen and eating doughnuts!
-The lock down being lifted in Boston

-The people I know in Boston checking in with me

-The authorities apprehending the possible suspect alive. There's no need for any more bodies. 

-This video:

-This quote:

"Laugh loud, and laugh often. It'll keep you happy, keep you healthy, and keep your attitude headed in a positive direction."

-laughter

-a good volunteer tonight 

-the basics

-free food

-as always, my friends. 

Gratitude on the go! 4-18-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"with genuine love and compassion, another person's appearance or behavior has no affect your attitude."
-four wheel drive
-the kind people at my VO. Brooke, Pam, and Jeff. Don't want to forget their names.
-the weather not getting me down.
-free food.
-watching old episodes of the twilight zone.
-the 20 people at the show tonight. They were surprisingly great.
-Ruthie having me over to her place to hang out a bit. Amanda was there too. It was great
-laughter
-unapologetic laughter
-Sara B's new single Brave. It's all kinds of crazy awesome.
-trouncing in the snow
-learning to make the most of it
-living in the moment
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-17-13

Today I am grateful for:
-this quote:
"Plunge boldly into the thick of life"
-a magnificent email from Amy.
-my co-workers at the SMM
-seeing a movie with Amanda. This week it was The Call. It was alright. The ending I most definitely just said, "...Wait...WHAT?"
-dinner and doughnuts with Anna Hickey.
-the 90s.
-the greatest gif that has ever been made. I'm 100% not joking about that.
-laughter.
-catching up with Bead
-padre
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 3-16-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This quote:
"If you want to be great, make others feel great."
-my therapist. We're still doing really proactive stuff. It's challenging, but not overwhelming. It actually feels pretty great. I feel like I'm finally connecting with my body.
-NUTS
-Lunch with Megan. She is fantastic. We really talked it out today. Things got deep. Things got real. In a good way though! She really let me know how she was doing these days. Both the good and the bad. I appreciated that. I also was able to share how I was doing in the same regard. We talked about work, lack of work, transitions, tv shows, motherhood, therapy...actually all of the different therapies we're doing. It was definitely a TRE/daring greatly moment to share about group therapy for me. I told her and then immediately regretted it. For the first few seconds it looked like she wasn't going to be able to handle what I just told her. Her face dropped a little and her mouth went slightly slack, but after a little bit she thanked me for being honest and admired my courage to do the work I'm doing. So it seemed like she was able to handle it and it was okay. I honestly believe our openness with one another brought our friendship to a new place. It was nice. We also pinkie promised that we would try to call one another in times of need or struggle. Emphasis on try. It's a work in progress for both of us.
-the shredder Bobby let me borrow.
-CAP rehearsal. The show is sooo much fun and my little actor is outstanding. She tries something new every time. Sometimes things work, sometimes they don't, but I love that she's always changing.
-Seeing Jen! She stopped by CAP rehearsal with Oscar. It was wonderful. She was wonderful. Her laugh is a day maker.
-all the people who were at Lance's Celebration of Life gathering. I had no idea what to expect when Andy and I went there. Honestly, I was thinking it was just going to be some people from the workshop. It wasn't though! There were a ton of family and friends there. It was really really lovely and not awkward at all.
-Anna being able to come with me to dinner at Amanda's new restaurant.
-Tres Leches Cake. For. real.
-a lovebomb text from Amy. :)
-Amanda coming over after work and catching up and watching the voice. Amanda does a wonderful job of almost always saying the right thing. Whether it's understanding or consoling or being down right hilarious, which the latter is most often the case, it's always wonderful to hear what she has to say.
-So much laughter
-being cracked out
-the time to catch up on emails
-actually feeling tired
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-15-13

Today I am grateful for:
-Getting a bunch of great emails today. On the work front I was asked to be a part of the next workshop show and to come back and teach at Chanhassen again. On the friend front I got a wonderful email from both Nora and Jen. Lots of winning happening.
-lunch with Padre
-being silly.
-hearing about some good new books
-laughter
-the safety of my friends who live in Boston. I checked in with them and they're all doing well. Spooked, but safe. My thoughts go to those in struggle right now.
-This quote by Amanda Palmer:
"THESE ARE THE MOMENTS. we band together. we don't fear. we take care of each other. we don't yell. we HELP."
-Dinner with Ruthie and Brittany. Love those ladies.
-This video:

-music
-being able to talk about my crush.
-this Marmite Buzzfeed. Even if some of these things are a joke, I don't care. I love me some marmite!
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-14-13

Today I am grateful for:
-crafting
-Amanda sharing her joyful news that her sister is pregnant. She is so excited to be an aunt. I feel so honored and lucky that she shared that news with me. Her joy is my joy!
-my students. They rocked out a good showcase today.
-this quote:
"Hearing kind words, be grateful. Hearing harsh speech, be empathic."
this video:
-TED talks in general
-hanging out with Ruth this evening. I originally went over to her place to just give her her birthday present, but instead it turned into a whole night. We went to see a show, 5 Lesbians Eating A Quiche, and then got sushi. The show was hilarious and the sushi was fantastic. Not to mention good company.

We got new names for the show. 

-Being present. I'm present to the fact that my mood shifts dramatically depending on others. That maybe sounds like bs, but it's honestly not. If other people are happy, I tend to be happy. If other people are upset, I get upset. If other people are in pain, I feel pain too. I hate when are people are in struggle. All I want to do is help them to get out whatever they're going through. I know that is not how it works, but at least I can let them know that even though I might not be able to fix it, I am ready to go through it with them.

-The basics

-music

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-13-13

Today I am grateful for:
-my magic bullet. I might have made a banana and peanut butter milkshake for breakfast. Maybe. It could have happened. There might have been a bit of nutella in it too. It could have also maybe been really delicious.
-these quotes:
"To be secure, be humble. To be happy, be content."
"Try to be mindful, and let things take their natural course. Then your mind will become still, like a clear forest pool."
"If you think you're anything less than beautiful, you're wasting your time. Time is a non-renewable resource. Let yourself be beautiful."
-The SMM
-chatting with Litza
-good shows at the workshop
-great audiences
-TJ's frozen dinners
-hanging out with Anna.
-watching old disney movies
-buzzfeed. particularly this and this and this.
-uncontrollable laughter
-getting a thank you letter in the mail from Jen. It just brought a smile right to my face.
-this article Jen sent me about artists.
-melatonin
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-12-13

Today I am grateful for:
-The SMM
-having the time to watch some tv
-crafting
-having the time to take a nap! What?! I did it!
-a good audience volunteer
-laughter
-the really friendly guy at the grocery store. He genuinely wanted to know how I was doing. He was a day maker for sure.
-candles
-hearing other people's stories. I found out a lot of cool things about some of the people who work at the workshop. It was really nice.
-sharing
-letting things go
-the basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-11-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being able to sleep in
-my magic bullet. Smoothies are the BEST
-teaching with Shanan Custer. It's still blows my mind a bit. She's so awesome!
-the kids that shared their writing today
-CAP.
-realizing the word lovely and volley have the same letters in different orders. Mind. Blown.
-the shitty weather not getting me down.
-soup
-the basics
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-10-13

Today I am grateful for:
-NUTS
-Seeing Jen Scott at an audition. I literally smiled so wide my face hurt. And I might have dropped to my knees with excitement. That might have (definitely) happened.
-The voice over work I've gotten
-crafting
-nerding out about improv
-Brittany. It's her birthday today. It's funny that I've only known her for about a year and a half because it feels much longer than that. I love how we're usually on the same page about everything and that we can pick up right where we left off no matter what. She's a great friend. Happy birthday, Brittany! I hope your day has been wonderful.
-laughter
-the basics
-melatonin
-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-9-13

Today I am grateful for:
-This link. I think its great advice for everyone.
-This quote:
"Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know."
-My therapist. Really good session today. I found out that she knows about Jenny Lawson. Day. Made.
-Being present. My therapist and I are really working hard at helping me get present in my body depending on my moods. It's hard to put words to how I'm feeling physically but I'm getting there slowly but surely.
-Seeing familiar faces at an audition
-Making a smoothie. Weather be damned! I'm ready for spring so I made a smoothie. Raspberries, yogurt, and spinach. Delicious.
-CAP. I found out tonight that I'm gonna be in Jen's show! Again. Day. Made.
-Jen Scott. She's been in my thoughts lately. I hope she's doing well.
-Meeting up with Shanan to discuss this teaching gig we're doing together. Nervous and excited.
-Laughter
-Cooking
-Chap stick
-Anna C. letting me tap into her HBO Go account.
-The basics
-Hope
-Day Making things.
-The rule of three.
-As always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-8-13

Today I am grateful for:
-Seeing Jurassic Park in 3D at the IMAX today. That movie holds up SO well! It was incredible.
-Monday Movie Day with Amanda.
-Taco lunch
-being able to get all my laundry done.
-the time to catch up on emails
-hanging out with Brittany and Amanda in the evening. We went to Brasa for dinner and then came back to my place to watch The Voice and SNL. It was such a fun evening. Dinner (and dessert) was spectacular and the conversation was OUTstanding. I haven't laughed that hard in such a long time. Those ladies make me feel so happy.

Pulled chicken, rice and beans, fried yucca, chips and guac, and cornbread.
Oh Brasa. Be still my heart. 

These ladies+Brasa=Happiness 

-uncontrollable laughter

-THIS:

-And this! Get em Zarah! 

-Margaret Cho. I forgot what a brilliant comedian and writer she is and how much she inspired me as a teenager and as an adult now. 

-the basics 

-tissues
-today being an overall extremely happy day. :) 

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-7-13

Today I am grateful for:
-waking up to an email about a teaching job
-Lena's 2nd birthday party. I cannot believe that she's two. Time flies!
-talking about crafts with Rhiannon
-Seeing Renata at the Tea Garden
-Free food
-The class I taught going by quickly. The kids did a great job with some really hard exercises.
-Seeing a possum in a tree!

I don't care what anyone says
Possums are the best!
I love Possums! 

-crafting

-Lauren's birthday! It was a really fun dinner party with a great group of people.

-late night car rides with Padre 

-my sense of smell. I have a small head cold I believe because I can't really smell anything. Didn't realize how grateful I am for smell until I didn't have it. 

-laughter

-The basics

-hot showers
-the sound of rain

-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-6-13

Today I am grateful for:
-these quotes:
"Friendship with one's self is all important because, without it, one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world."
"I believe the most important single thing, beyond discipline and creativity is daring to dare."
-feeling genuinely happy. It's been awhile. A long while. I want to remember what some of the things were that made me feel this way. I know the overall theme of my happiness tonight was that I was just being a fuckin goof. I'm a goof at heart man! And I gave zero fucks about how others viewed me. The last two nights I've messed up during the news segment of the show and got super embarrassed, but I just embraced it! I was also being really silly in improv tonight. I just fuckin jumped and didn't stop or try to judge myself. Then later in the night I was rockin out to some music in the car. First Queen came on and I was like Heck Yes! Then Sir Mix-O-Lot came on after and I still know every single word to Baby Got Back. I was dancing like a fool and just grinning my ass off. I was having fun! I was care free! I was really being and feeling like myself for the first time in a long time. It felt and still feels fucking great!
-Swearing.
-Laughing
-music. Music is such a mood shifter. I. love. Music.
-Wall to wall still being a thing on facebook. It took me awhile to find it, but once I did it was sweeeet! It's really cool to be able to look back on stuff with my friends from 2005. Eight years ago yo!
-This tweet:

So he might be married with kids for all I know!
A girl can still be flattered right? 

-The basics

-the pictures I ordered arriving today. 

-quiet. My thoughts aren't spiraling tonight. I guess you could say I literally have peace of mind. 

-as always, my friends.

Gratitude on the go! 4-5-13

Today I am grateful for:
-The SMM
-Buzzfeed acknowledging how awesome it is to live in Minnesota.
-laughter
-remembering to let things go.
-One Republic. I'm a fan man. They got some really driving beats and some up lifting lyrics.
-living in the moment.
-Ruth. It's her birthday today. We've been friends for 20 years and I'm beyond grateful for her friendship. We were (and still are) very different people with completely different backgrounds and yet we're still friends. We've defied the odds. And I couldn't be happier. So happy birthday Ruth. I admire your courage, your tenacity, and your crazy amount of energy. I am honored to have such a kind and brave friend. I wish you all the best always.
-the workshop
-the little things. In the end, I feel like the little things are actually the big things.
-this quote:
"Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year"
-The basics
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-4-13

Today I am grateful for:
-being inspired.
-crafting. My project today failed, but now I know my mistakes and next time it's ON like Donkey Kong!
-Mod-Podge
-the word(s?) Mod-Podge. :)
-this this this! This video made me laugh so hard. Minute 2:55 until the end is what really did me in:

-laughter
-seeing Evil Dead after the show. So. Good. I mean it really exceeded my expectations. I kind of even want to see it again to catch more of the nods to the first films. I'm such a Sam Raimi fan and Bruce Campbell and Rob Tapert and they were all producers on this new retake. So I know they had a lot of input to this remake. It was really smart and totally terrifying. I loved it.
-knowing my mom is safe. I got a phone call from my mom saying that she was scared to be home alone because she heard a loud noise and wanted to come over to my place. I didn't get this message until after the movie, so I was already freaking out, but after I heard that voicemail I obviously got more freaked out and texted her back to check in with her. She's fine.
-Lance Burns. He was our security guy at the workshop. He just passed away in the last few days. I am truly saddened by this. I just saw him last Saturday! We still don't have any information about his cause of death yet. I am grateful for the time that he was around. He was always carried a book with him. I really loved that about him for some reason. And he was just a kind soul. I'll miss you Lance.
-the basics
-what I have right now
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-3-13

Today I am grateful for:
-baby smiles
-baby sitting
-mid afternoon movie with Amanda. (I love our weekly movie date.) This week was The Host. Actually not so bad. Better than I thought it would be.
-laughter
-homemade dinner
-being able to catch up on emails.
-being able to catch up on tv.
-getting an email from Nora.
-Ruth making it home safe from Jamaica.
-being present.
-the basics
-ice cream
-as always, my friends

Gratitude on the go! 4-2-13

Today I am grateful for:
-An early morning shower
-my therapist
-lunch with Padre
-being inspired
-crafting. Here's what I drew for Steph's bday card:

On the other side of the card it says BUT I DO!
Because otherwise that would be rude. 

-Brittany and Amanda coming over to watch The Voice

-SO MUCH LAUGHTER. 

-Brittany being back. It's been so great to catch up with her. It's almost like we've been living parallel lives because we've been basically experiencing the same things in almost every regard. And it's just so nice to be able to vent about boys, roommates, tv, friends, etc and be on the same page about everything. 

-journaling and how really amazing it is for one's mental state. 

-the basics

-warm sheets

-as always, my friends 

Gratitude on the go! 4-1-13

Today I am grateful for:
-Red meat. My whole life I've never eaten any form of cow or pig, but today that all ended. Steak is the greatest thing ever. I can't believe I waited this long to try it. I thought I would prefer it prepared well done, but nope! I'm diggin it rare. THE BEST
-Trying my first cigarette. I had no idea that it would calm my nerves SO MUCH. I'm making that a habit from now on.
-Whales. They're like the best creature in all the land. I love them so much I could just stare at them for days and days and days!
-The basics
-Kale
-April Fools